WHAT NOW ?

I’ve Conversed With People Who Think I’m Smart, Maybe Very Accomplished, Multi Skilled For My Age, This Whole Journey Started Since 2015 But Recently I Haven’t Been Doing Any Work, Just Thinking And Speaking, No Actions Yet, Still Get The Unnecessary Hype, Living On Past Glory...

Why Do I “Makes Money Moves” ? I Have No Reason To Tbvh, I’m One Of Those People Who Just Have To Go To School, Come Out, Get Behind The Desk, Get A Husband, Start A Family, Vacation During Leave And I’ll Be Satisfied, Well To Do Financially And Very Happy Till I Retire....People Like This Are Also Creatives And Passionate And Their Passion Are Like Hobbies Not Careers, Yk Like Being A Doctor And Seldomly Doing Music Amd Getting It....

Anyways, So I Turned My Talents To Passion To Money To Obsession, I Overwork Myself Tbh (Well I Used To) Till I Exhausted The Genius In Me, I Have Little Ideas Left, Thinking Gives Me Migraine, Actions Are A No No And They Say I Have “Creative’s Block”, That’s No Problem 

The Problem Now Is, I’m Fading Away, Oyiza Is Turning To Thin Air Which Shouldn’t Be A Problem Because I Always Wanted To Be A Ghost, Well Not Just Any Kind Of Ghost, Kendrick Lamar Kind Of Ghost, Everyone Knows Me But No One Knows What I’m Up To ! 

That Brings Us To The Main Reason I Started Working In The First Place, I Was Alienated By Society, Was It My Voice, My Looks, My Eyes, My “Weirdness”, I Was Tired Of Being Called Different, Being Called Four Eyes, Being Asked Why My Voice Was Tiny, I Was TIRED !!! Then In Relationships (I’m Talking Friendship & Love Too & Maybe Family), There Were Times People Left, Just Left Me, The Reasons They Gave Were Not Good Enough You Know, I Was/Am Always Certain It Was Me, I Felt Unloved You Know So I Had To Find A Way To Make Me Stand Out That Even Amidst My Flaws, Someone Would Love Me And Have A Good Reason To Show Me Off And Keep Me

But What Happens Now That I’m Fading ? Back To Bully Stage ? I Know I Don’t Need Nobody Else’s Validation But  ......